Recipe: Bacon and Cream Cheese Dip

We threw a little BBQ party the other day but it was on a Friday. Right after work. This meant I couldn’t do much cooking and we had to resort to mostly store bought stuff. It’s not my style, but it was still a lot of fun. Paro poured so much booze into the Long Islands, I had to stand at least 4 feet away from the grill for fear of spontaneous combustion. One thing I did do though, was make some dip.

We had crackers and chips and nachos and everything, but I really wanted to make one killer dip that would have people gathering around it like it was a f*cking Ouija board or something. The only problem was, I decided to do this exactly 17 minutes before the party started. I slammed my laptop shut and dived into the refrigerator like a fugitive.


Cream cheese – 300 gm
Bacon – 5 strips
Chives – a handful – chopped fine
Onion – 1 small, chopped tiny
Garlic – 1 clove, minced
Sour cream – 1 tbsp (optional)
Bus ticket – 0

Chop bacon small, toss in frying pan over medium heat. You want this to get nice and brown not terrible and black. While that’s happening, transfer the cream cheese to a bowl and work it with a spatula so it isn’t too stiff. Add the onion and the garlic.

Once the bacon is browned, let the pan rest at an angle so you can drain off all the fat. We only want to use the meat in the dip. This thing is unhealthy enough as it is. Once you’re satisfied that all the fat has run off to the side, add the crispy bacon bits to the dip and mix well. I added some sour cream because the dip felt a little stiff, but it’s totally optional. You can even add a splash of milk if you like. Do whatever, man. It’s dip with bacon in it. You really can’t go wrong with your life now.

Makin' bacon
Makin’ bacon



Worth the calories. - Shri Stone Cold Steve Austin
Worth the calories. – Shri Stone Cold Steve Austin
Add the chopped chives and feel the dip come to life! Add freshly ground black pepper and mix again. Swerve when your better half throws something heavy at you and accuses you of having no sense of time. Regain composure, serve with chips and commence party.

Over and out!

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